Label2.Caption = "You might be an engineer if ..."
a = "...choosing to buy flowers for your girlfriend or upgrading your RAM is a moral dilemma."
b = "...you take a cruise so you can go on a personal tour of the engine room."
c = "...the sales people at the local computer store can't answer any of your questions."
d = "...you bought your wife a new CD-ROM drive for her birthday."
e = "...you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie."
f = "...you can type 70 words per minute but can't read your own handwriting."
g = "...you comment to your wife that her straight hair is nice and parallel."
h = "...you have saved every power cord from all your broken appliances."
i = "...you have more friends on the Internet than in real life."
j = "...you know what http:// stands for."
k = "...you look forward to Christmas so you can put the kids' toys together."
l = "...you see a good design and still have to change it."
m = "...you window shop at Radio Shack. "
n = "...your wife hasn't the foggiest idea of what you do at work."
o = "...you've already calculated how much you make per second."
p = "...you've tried to repair a $5 radio."
q = "...your laptop computer costs more than your car."
r = "THE END"
If Label3.Caption = "" Then
Label3.Caption = a
ElseIf Label3.Caption = a Then
Label3.Caption = b
ElseIf Label3.Caption = b Then
Label3.Caption = c
ElseIf Label3.Caption = c Then
Label3.Caption = d
ElseIf Label3.Caption = d Then
Label3.Caption = e
ElseIf Label3.Caption = e Then
Label3.Caption = f
ElseIf Label3.Caption = f Then
Label3.Caption = g
ElseIf Label3.Caption = g Then
Label3.Caption = h
ElseIf Label3.Caption = h Then
Label3.Caption = i
ElseIf Label3.Caption = i Then
Label3.Caption = j
ElseIf Label3.Caption = j Then
Label3.Caption = k
ElseIf Label3.Caption = k Then
Label3.Caption = l
ElseIf Label3.Caption = l Then
Label3.Caption = m
ElseIf Label3.Caption = m Then
Label3.Caption = n
ElseIf Label3.Caption = n Then
Label3.Caption = o
ElseIf Label3.Caption = o Then
Label3.Caption = p
ElseIf Label3.Caption = p Then
Label3.Caption = q
ElseIf Label3.Caption = q Then
Label3.Caption = r
Else
Label3.Caption = ""
End If
End Sub
Private Sub Command1_Click()
'TechNotes
Label2.Caption = "Technical Difficulties"
a = "When a tech says he's coming right over, go for coffee. It's nothing to us to remember 2700 screen saver passwords."
b = "When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and Popsicle art. We don't have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours."
c = "When tech support sends you an e-mail with high importance, delete it at once. We're just testing out the public groups."
d = "When a tech is eating lunch at his desk, walk right in and spill your guts out. We exist only to serve."
e = "When a tech is having a smoke outside, ask him a computer question. The only reason why we smoke at all is to ferret out those clients who don't have e-mail or a telephone line."
f = "Send urgent e-mail ALL IN UPPERCASE. The mail server picks it up and flags it as a rush delivery."
g = "When you call a tech's direct line, press 5 to skip the bilingual greeting that says he's out of town for a week, record your message, and wait exactly 24 hours before you send an e-mail straight to the director because no one ever returned your call. You're entitled to common courtesy"
h = "When the photocopier doesn't work, call computer support. There's electronics in it."
i = "When you're getting a NO DIAL TONE message at home, call computer support. We can fix your line from here."
j = "When something's wrong with your home PC, dump it on a tech's chair with no name, no phone number and no description of the problem. We love a puzzle."
k = "When you have a tech on the phone walking you through changing a setting; read the
